Monday, March 9, 2015

Timing is Everything (28)

"All rise!" The bailiff says as we all stand to our feet. After the meeting that was held a few days ago I know this will all be over today!

As Judge Pratt approaches we all stand and I'm grinning from ear to ear when the judge cuts his eyes at me and I then realize who I'm defending and why. This quickly wipes that same grin off my face. This is one bittersweet job for me. I'm great at what I do but I represent scumbags majority of the time.

"Be seated." The bailiff tells us.

"Mr. Hale, is your witness ready?" Judge Pratt asks as he looks Quick's way with the slightest of grins. I look to Quick who is staring at Judge Pratt grinning back at him.

"Um, your honor my client is no longer going to speak. I have spoken with the family and we have discovered Mrs. Harris' testimony would have said anything to get Mr. Ellis convicted of this crime." Hale rises and says with a look of defeat on his face.

Everyone in the courtroom is shocked, they don't even make a sound but you can see by everyone's demeanor that they did not see this coming at all.

"Wow, well, this...this is very surprising. There is no murder weapon, no credible witness, lack of evidence. I'm left with no choices here, this case is dismissed.

You could hear a pin drop.

"You a bad motherfucker Ely." Quick said to me as he turned around to celebrate with his crew.

"I hope you're happy you son of a bitch! What if it was your child? You fucking disgust me." Mrs. Harris was enraged with me. I cannot be mad at her feelings, I can only imagine what she may be experiencing right now.

"Come on baby, let's go." Mr. Harris quickly grabs his wife before she can go on.

"Baby? This was your fucking idea. You won't even tell me why!" She began sobbing right then in there.

"It's for our own protection baby. We're just going to get out of here." He tries his best to calm her down as he walks her out the courtroom.

My phone rings as the courtroom begins to clear and I quickly walk out so that I can answer it.

"Yo, what's up Zach." I was surprised to hear from Zach and happy, I haven't heard from him in a long time.

"Hey man, congrats!" We already heard the news. You won another one."

"Wow how'd you guys hear so quick, I'm literally still here."

"Dude, it's already on the news, people aren't too happy though. Why don't you come back to the office man. We can go celebrate." He says

"I don't know man. I think I should go see how Aria is doing." I tell him.

"Yeah man, of course. Uh, maybe next time." I can sense the disappointment in his tone.

"You know what man, I'll just swing by and we can go get a beer."

"Hell yeah dude, that'll be awesome." Zach of course now is cheerful.

"Cool, I'll just give Ari and call and head over." I say finding a door where I can avoid the press outside.

"Sweet." Zach says as the phone call ends.

"Hey babe, how you doing over there?" I ask Aria.

"I'm great, feels like I'm about to pop though but Bobbi is taking good care of me...oh! How'd the case go?" She asks even though I know she knows already.

"I won. Doesn't feel like much of a win given the circumstances." The entire thing is still hard to
stomach.

"It's your job babe. Sometimes you're going to have to represent assholes. Comes with the territory."

"Yeah I guess you're right. Hey would you mind if I go grab a beer with Zach, you know, little celebration?" I ask anticipating a strong no.

"Go ahead I'm good here, I'll call you if I need anything. Love you." She's very upbeat today, I love it.

"Great, I love you too baby." I hang up.

On my way back to the office I thought about what Ari said, assholes come with the territory. I have to accept that. Well at least try. I am however beginning to get the feeling that I cannot keep representing these guys. It's just really taking a toll on me, like I'm straight up contradicting my morals. I try to put all that to rest as I walk into our office.

"SURPRISE!!!" My entire floor is there to greet me.

"Whoa, what's this?" I ask with a smile on my face.

"You my friend just won a big fucking case, because of that shit is about to blow up for everyone around here. Especially you." Zach comes and put his arm around my neck as we walk to grab some cake.

"How the hell did you get all this stuff here so fast?" I ask.

"These interns move pretty damn fast for fifty bucks my friend. Speaking of which, I would like to see what the new girl is willing to do." Zach laughs and tells me.

"Keep it up man and I will be representing you soon and charging you double." We laugh as we drifts off.

"I knew you could do it." A familiar voice is heard and I turn around to see who it is.

"Oh my God. What are you doing here Viv? I thought...you were gone." My stomach suddenly feels terrible.

"Yeah I'm back but not like before. I've been to counseling and all. I just want to tell you congratulations." She appears to be sincere as she opens her arms for a hug in which I accept and she also kisses me on the cheek. "I am so sorry for everything." She backs up holding my hands as she apologizes.

"All is forgiven." I was never one to hold a grudge. She walks away and I see Jennifer approaching me, the new intern. I just know that Zach crossed the line.

"Hey Mr. Ely, there was a woman by the name of Bobbi at the front desk looking for you but she took off. She didn't say what she wanted or anything." Jennifer says before she spots Zach and walks off.

What the hell is she doing here? Why is she not with Ari? I sneak by people, shake hands and thank people for there kindness until I'm able to get through the door. I get downstairs and to my car and race home.

When I pull up to the house, the car is gone. Bobbi's car is still here so she could be home.

"Ari please don't tell me Bobbi is out here driving our car." I yell as I come in but get no answer.

I walk upstairs and nobody is there. I walk through the entire house, nothing. Somebody did spill something in on the floor. Why the hell didn't this get cleaned up?

I go back upstairs to the bedroom and begin to call Aria, straight to voice mail. When I sit down on the bed I notice something is missing. Aria's hospital bags are gone and now everything makes sense.

"FUCK!"

I grab my keys and head out the door.


Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Dirty Hands (27)

"Wait outside." Mr. Harris firmly tells his wife.

"No, if he has som..." Mrs. Harris shows her frustration with her husband. 

"Look I want to hear what the man has to say and if he only wants to speak to me then so be it. So please, wait outside." He says with he eyes on me the entire time. 

But hone..." She pleads.

"Thank you." Still focused me, I see his wife upset but she leaves and shuts the door behind her. 

"What's this about?" Mr. Harries finally speaks to me. 

"You need to keep your wife off the stand." I tell him firmly. If I played poker the face I'm staring at him with would be a killer at the table. 

"Tell me, why the hell would I do that?" He scoots up in his chair to better hear me I guess or intimidate me. Now Mr. Harris is a big man, 6'6 and at least 260 pounds of muscle so I would be lying to say I wasn't scared. 

"You killed him." I say sharply, hoping fear can't be heard in voice. 

"I killed who?" He stood up over my desk.

"Your son, that's blood on your hands." I stand up as well, usually being 6'4 helps me tower over others, not this time. 

Mr. Harris just stands there for a moment then begins to pace. 

"I needed the money. We needed the money. I thought I would be able to get away fast enough but my wife didn't want to budge without an explanation. Women right? You married...no wedding band, I guess not. A boy? He kills a boy? Why not just kill me?" He begins to sob and I get a pain because I know everything but I have to do my job. 

"He's here. Tell your wife to go wait in the lobby and you can ask him yourself." I can see the fear on his face as he turns to walks out. 

"She's gone." He seems like he's not even here with me in the same room as he gazes off. 

"I'll be right back." I get up to leave the office. I can just imagine wages going through his mind as he stands there alone in my office with just his thoughts. 

I had Quick waiting in Zach's office since he didn't come in to work today. 

"He's ready to talk." I say.

"Well then, let's go."

We both leave out, my heart is pounding so fast right about now. I have no clue how this is going to play out.

"Tracy Harris. The boldest mother fucker in Chicago." I'm not even able to close the door before he begins speaking. 

"I'm going to kill you." He replies back coldly. 

"Whoa, you threaten me in front of my lawyer? I'm not the bad guy here. You stole from me man. We had a deal and you stole from me. Now why would you do that." 

"We needed the money." I'm thinking I should've checked them both for weapons before coming in here because it really looks as if he will kill him right here and now. 

"You know I do loans." Quick says extending his arms.

"I also know what happens to people who take out loans from you and can't pay back in full at one time." 

"Now you also know what happens when a dumb mother fucker decides to steal from me." 

"I swear to God Quick as soon as we leave here I'm going to fucking shoot you." I believe him too, veins were popping out of his head as swear from holding his rage in came down his cheek. 

"See I know you would, we all know who you are, well were. I have my guys waiting to hear from me, you know the guys. See if they don't, they kind of kill your wife too. Is that what you want?" He says while stepping to Mr. Harris. 

"Son of a bitch! I hope you rot in jail." 

"Another mistake. If you wife testifies, we kill her. If we don't get our money back, we kill her." 

"Kill me. Kill me right now!" He pleads for his wife. 

"You know what? What's sixty thousand? Just have your bitch wife shut her fucking mouth and make sure we never see your bitch ass again and she will live." He says as his tone changes. 

"Why man?" He says confused. 

"I'm guessing that's a broad ass why. I killed your son because I had to take something from you that meant as much as my sixty thousand meant to me. We could've just kept building this thing man, you come in and let a bitch run your shit. Now look! Your life's all fucked up." Quick shakes his head and I'm shocked to learn another new detail to this entire thing. 

"She won't say anything." Mr. Harris just turns and leaves. 

"You know what Mr. Ely, I think we make a good team." He also turns and leaves shortly after. 

I'm just happy I didn't just have to witness a murder in my office. 




Monday, March 2, 2015

Loose Ends (26)

"She just fucked up. Bad." Quick was very upset.

"Wait, I can fix this." I'm still in shock with the entire thing. 

"I'm not leaving this one to chance. I killed the kid, you think I won't do the same to his mother?" He said before leaving the courthouse steps. 

Quick was right. This is bad. Mother taking the stand to take down her sons killer. He would stand a chance. His only positive would be not getting the death penalty since it's was abolished. 

As I'm riding home, I try to think up a solution to this new problem. After much deliberation I literally only come up with one way and it's a reach. I have no idea what this will do. In fact I can actually make things worse for everyone, even myself.

I put those thoughts to rest as I pulled up to my home. I'm still trying to fix all the wrong I have caused with Aria. I have been doing a good job so far if I must say so myself. I gather all of my things and head into the house.

"Babe! You home?" I walk around the house and she is nowhere to be found. Then I hear some movement upstairs so I walk up to the bedroom.

"Babe, what are you doing?" I say as I walk up the stairs. I open up the door and there is definitely someone in my bedroom that shouldn't be there.

"Hey Lance." Bobbi is there sitting on my bed. Never thought I would have to say that again.

"Bobbi what the hell are you doing in here...where's Aria?" The confused state is becoming all too familiar today.

"Oh she ran to the store."

"So why are you not with her? Isn't that the purpose of you being here?" Still very much confused.

"Yeah but I was in the bathroom and she swore she couldn't wait five minutes. You know how pregnant women get. We both know this isn't your first rodeo cowboy." She's clearly amused by this or maybe she is uncomfortable really. Either way some skeletons should stay in the closet.

I am literally standing there in silence, in shock. I can hear that Bobbi is speaking to me but I just cannot process the words. She eventually leaves the room. Why she would ever want to take me back to that day in college when she gave me the news.

"I'm pregnant."

"Damn, hello to you too Bobbi. Uhm. Congrats?" I say not really caring what she had just told me.

"Yeah nigga congrats." She snaps back.

"Wait...huh?" My heart dropped to my stomach.

"Yeah it's yours."

"Shit." My soul is broken.

"We're going to have to tell Aria at some point."

That was really one of the worst days of my life. Till this day I am afraid that one day Aria will find out what happened and almost happened between Bobbi and I. The way Bobbi has been speaking lately it's almost as if she wants her to find out. I can't think too much on it though because if I can't fix what happened at the courtroom earlier today.

"Hey babe, you okay." Aria comes and puts her hand on my shoulder.

"Huh...yeah, yeah, I'm just uh, standing. Looking...at the room. How you doing today baby?"

"I am good now that I have my snacks but I'm tired and my back hurts, my feet hurts. So it'll be great if you can rub those down for me maybe?" She asks me in the cutest way possible.

"Of course babe, let me eat and I will cater to you for the remainder of the evening." I tell her.

Last night was a good way to take my mind off that case but now it's back to reality. I set up a meeting in an attempt to keep the mother from talking.

"I appreciate you all meeting me here today." I start off.

"What exactly do you want from me Mr. Ely? If it's to shut me up then you'd better find another angle. If I can recall correctly I asked you for help and you could not help me, remember?" She is heated. This is not how I expected this meeting to begin.

"Yes mam that is correct but I'm really hoping to speak to your husband, alone." I say respectfully and I can see Mr. Harris is shocked. He hasn't said much the entire case.

"Uhm whatever you can say to him you can say to me." She snaps once again.

"Okay but before I proceed, let me say to you Mr. Harris, what I have to say will bring everything in the dark to the light." I say knowing he understands me.

Mr. Harris face now shows fright.


Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Cleaning Tracks (25)

As I'm leaving out for work I hear the doorbell ring. Not expecting anyone I'm hoping it's not a random pop up from a relative. Unfortunately, it's worst. It was Bobbi but I'm Having a great morning so it doesn't even phase me.

"Good morning Bobbi, what are you doing here?" I ask cheerfully.

"Heyyyy Lance, you know I'm here to take care of your wife while you're gone." She replies loud and obnoxiously.

"Well these days I don't need much help." I say still smiling as I pass her by the door on my way to the car.

I'm glad I'm in such a good mood today because it's taking away from my nerves for meeting with Quick this morning before we go back to the court room.

When I arrive at the office I see Zach in the lobby, lounging as he normally does. Seeing him had me more nervous than having to speak with Quick again. This guy is my best friend and I have just been giving him the cold shoulder.

"Yo, Lance!' It didn't take long for him to spot me.

"Hey man." I wasn't as excited to see him since I know he's probably hurt.

"Yeah, hey. Where ya been dude? I've been hitting you up and nothing. Haven't seen you around here lately. What's going on?" His tone changes drastically at at this point.

"Well it's just been a lot going on. You know how it can get sometimes." I reply somberly.

"Yeah, well. I'll just let you get to it. We sound like we're sleeping together." He laughs lightly then turns and leave.

As much as I'm hurt that I'm not as close to my best friend like I should be, I also realize that being around him isn't in my best interests right now. He is everything I do not need to be and I cannot say I'm strong enough to be around him and end up like him. Even if it's just a fraction of him rubbing off on me, I just can't risk it. Now for awkward moment number two. I have to convince Quick that I have everything under control, which I do, I just need him to be on board.

As I approach my office I see that Quick is already in there and I swiftly turn around to talk to our receptionist.

"Tracy, hey good morning." I say gently

"Good morning Mr. Ely, there's a ma..." I interrupt her.

"Uh yes, there's a man in my office, why...how did he get in there." I'm very confused at this point.

"He's scary. I had maintenance let him in. I'm so sorry." She was very apologetic.

"It's fine." I really meant that when I said it too because she's right, he's scary. I hurry back to my office.

"Mr. Ellis, how are you?" I say firmly as I reach out to him for a handshake.

"This witness, are you handling him or am I." He doesn't stand to shake my hand, shit he doesn't shake my hand at all.

"I want to assure you that I have everything under control. This witness will ever be heard from again after today's hearing." I'm ,hoping he believes me at this point.

"Well, you better be right."

In the courtroom I'm confident because I am certain this is all about to come to an end as I ready to bring Mr. Watkins to the stand.

"Your father wrote that note for us, correct Mr. Watkins?"

"Yes"

"Is it true that your father likes to write stories frequently about things that go on around the neighborhood?"

"Yes, he does."

"So was it a note you read or was it a part of one of his stories."

"Well it was in his journal..."

"So this can be on of his stories?"

"Yeah but why would he lie about that.?" Mr. Watkins is now clearly disturbed about what I am saying about his father.

"I believe in regards to stories it's called fiction Mr. Watkins. Does your father watch a lot of news broadcasts?"

"Yeah." He is clearly annoyed at this point.

"Has he ever seen my client on the news?"

"Of course, we all have."

"How does your father feel about Mr. Ellis?"

"He shares the same hatred for him like the rest of the community."

"Hmm, is it also true that your father suffers from dementia." I got him. I can see the other lawyer's devastation in his eyes.

"Yes." He softly replies as his teeth cringes.

"So your honor if we are going to let a dementia ridden writer who apparently hates my client decide this case we should just end this here." I say confidently as I approach my seat.

"You just earned a mother fucking bonus my nigga." Quick whispers as I take my seat as he tries to hide his grin.

"I hope you have another witness Mr. Hale. With no no murder weapon and now a discredited witness I'm leaning towards dismissing this case." Judge Pratt said also showing obvious discomfort.

"I um..your honor, I do no..." Hale is quickly interrupted.

"Yes he does." The voice is faintly familiar but I cannot pinpoint it. Both Quick and I turn to see who interjected and we are both shocked to who we see.

"If you don't have a plan for this one it will definitely be handled by me personally and I will be glad to do."

Well there goes that bonus.



Sunday, September 14, 2014

That Aha Moment (24)

I sit in my car and let out a sigh of relief and laugh. Quickly I cease the laughter when I realize I should have never been in this situation in the first place. This is the first time I seen everything that has happened over the last few months was my doing. I have to be better, I cannot lose Ari. I went crazy with her just being away a month so I don't want to find out how I would feel if I lost her for the rest of my life. 

Driving home I begin to feel overwhelmed. I've never thought about being married when I was younger, all the way up to college. Honestly, I did it because that's what you're supposed to do. This is the first time I've felt like I can actually do this, you know be with her for the rest of my life. Of course I get myself together as I pull up to the house.

It's not too late when I get home but it looks like Ari has already went to bed. The lights are all out, when I walk up to the bedroom I see the tv is off. I'm actually glad, I just want to admire her. 

After I get all ready for bed I just sit at the foot of the bed and just look at her. I'm just thankful. My mother used to tell me she would sit at the foot of our beds sometimes and just admire what God has given her. That is exactly what I am doing. At this very moment everything seems so surreal to me.

I'm not even supposed to be here right now. I was the guy who had all the women and got all the attention he wanted. There was a time when I thought I needed that. Now here I am, I have her. Someone who has been in my corner from day one. She's stuck by my side through everything. The fact that I almost have myself to someone else is now suddenly sickening. 

I feel a tear run down the side of my cheek. Usually your first reaction is to wipe the tear away but not a tear like this. This is the purest tear that I have ever had, the perfect balance between love and understanding. In this tear was no guilt which a lot of my tears have had before. 

I can't remember the last time I had prayed but now felt like a great time. I stand up and go right beside Ari on the side of the bed and drop down to my knees.

"God, I know it's been awhile since we spoke but I also know you'll hear me out. First off I'm sorry for taking so long to thank you for what you've done for me thus far. For the longest time I've just believed I deserved everything that I have and I don't. I especially did not deserve a woman like Ari. Don't get me wrong, I'm thankful for everything else you've done for me but this woman you gave me Lord, she is my finest treasure. I mean you said it yourself, he who finds a wife finds a good thing, or something like that. I'm a little rusty on the scriptures. Well I mean that's all, I just really wanted to thank you for her and tell you I will be the husband that I am meant to be. Oh and amen."

I stay at Ari's side to speak to her while she sleeps.

"Thank you baby for getting me over my fear of relationships. For showing me that one great woman is greater than all the women on earth. I know that I've messed up a lot recently but stick with me because I will make you happy for the rest of your life. I love you and thank you for keeping me."

I get up, kiss Ari and crawl into bed with the only woman I hope to ever share a bed with for the rest of my life. 

Sunday, September 7, 2014

Crazed (23)

I still can't move as thought after thought runs through my mind. I honestly believed every word she said when she told me we hadn't done anything. Why would she lie, we could've had this conversation a long time ago. I just got out of the doghouse and this is something I could lose my marriage over. If I go back and tell Ari now she's going to think I was lying when I initially told her I didn't sleep with the woman. Any way I look at it I come out the loser. 

Then again, she did lose the baby and she said she's leaving. Ari never has to know. Shit, I wouldn't have known if I didn't visit this crazy woman in this hospital. Some things you have to take to the grave and this is one of those instances. 

I finally gather enough energy to raise up from my seat even though I must look just like a zombie the way I'm moving. 

"Well Viv I have to go now, best of luck on everything. You are a smart woman so I am sure everything will work out just fine. But I have to cut ties with you, right here, right now. This has gone way too far already. "I say with clamy hands and no emotion at all. 

She sits up and laughs. "You have to be kidding me. You got me pregnant and I lose your baby and all you have to say is good luck? Wow! Pathetic, you are pathetic!." She begins to scream. 

I walk out not responding. I probably deserve everything she's dishing out but I have to drop this. 

As I walk out I see a nurse walking my way, apparently annoyed. She must've heard the raucous. I want to stop her to ask but I can't. We pass one another. I turn back. 

"Excuse me, mam?" I say afraid that what I was just told is about to be verified. 

"Yes sir, do you need something?" It's clear to me that she's annoyed now.

"I'm sorry mam I don't want to bother you, never mind. I say beginning to walk away again. 

"No, I'm sorry it's fine. It's just been a rough night." She smiles and is welcoming now. 

"Look I just left this room right over here and had a talk with the young lady and I need to know something." I say quietly. 

"Oh, you must be him." She says with smirk and chuckle. 

"Him? Who's him? Me?" I'm confused. 

"Yeah, the daddy." She begins to laugh some more.

"Um did I miss something? What's funny?" I say kind of upset she would just laugh in my face like that.

"Oh you don't know?" She turns away from me and talks to a couple of nurses sitting around. "Ladies this is the daddy." She said making quotes with her fingers and laughing hyseterically.

"Mam please tell me what's funny." I'm fed up at this point. 

"Sir, between you and me, that bitch is crazy. She swears she had a miscarriage because of some stomach pains. That's only because the woman who beat her up kicked her in the damn stomach. We just have to keep her crazy ass until one of her looney family members picks her up. But they're flying out to get hers so unfortunately she'll be here for a couple of days." She says once again laughing and walking off for good.

Wow is all I can think. I feel a little lighter with every step I take as I make my way back on to the elevator. By the time I'm walking to my car I have a little pep to my step happy as shit she was lying and even happier that she is leaving. Now I can go home and continue on with life with nothing more to hide. 


Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Boom Goes the Dynamite (22)

I walk as if I'm going to the elevator only to turn around when I know Ari is gone to leave right back out to the door. It's horrible that I had to lie but she would have had a fit if she knew where I was going. So many questions would have came up: "Who is she?" "Why are you visiting her?" Where do you know her from"?. We all know how women can be and it would have just went on and on from there. It's just better to avoid that all together and just go check to see if Viv is alright.

I get in my car and begin to drive. I find myself afraid of what I may see at the hospital upon arrival. How bad is it? Did they tell her it was because of me? This entire thing is just getting worse and worse as layers are pulled up. 

I arrive at the hospital pretty fast and get all signed in so that I can go up and see her. I get on the elevator and there's nobody else on it so the silence is killing me. Some small talk beforehand would have eased my mind a bit. The elevator finally stops. I step off and immediately I am greeted by a nurse who directs me to the correct room.

I arrive at the door and see a body lying there still. Back towards me, seemingly looking outside of the window. I speak.

"Viv?" I say unsure of if it's even her or not.

The body still lie still as I walk closer.

"Viv, it's me, Lance." Still nothing. I walk closer to the motionless body expecting a random person just sleeping. Instead it is Viv and she is very much awake. She is just staring outside of the window crying silently. I sit down in the chair at the foot of the bed and just start talking.

"I'm so sorry for what's happened to you. It's so cowardly that someone would even do this to you. Just know that I'm here for you and that we miss you back at the office." I lean in and try to get her to look at me but I'm unsuccessful. 

"Bullshit Lance." She says breaking her silence.

"What? What's bullshit?" I say at a loss. 

"You're the only one to show any type of care. This is an unforgiving field obviously.  But I didn't expect anyone else to come so it's fine, it really is. You, I expected you to come. We shared a connection." She was bawling at this point. 

"Well yeah, we had a nice friendship around the office and beyond." I try to make her feel a little better. 

"Lance our connection was way more than that." She chuckled during her crying which I found strange but disregarded. 

"Uhhhh I don't really know what you're talking about but I hope you get well real soon so that you make it back to work." I get up out the seat I was in attempting to leave. 

"Oh Lance it was much more than that." She said finally looking away from the window and directly at me. 

"What are you talking about Viv?" I am very interested in what she has to say now. 

"Do you honestly think you just crawled in my bed and didn't touch me. I know you're a man but damn you can't be that naive." She rolled her eyes and laughed a bit more.

"You're lying and I don't understand why." I'm upset and thrown off balance a bit. 

"You think I'm lying? Ok, go head out there and ask the nurse about this miscarriage that I just had." Suddenly the laughter stops.

"Miscarriage of what?" I barely make that sentence out.

"Goddamn Lance do I have to spell it out? You were drunk and crawled into my bed and we fucked. I mean fucked and you gave me alllllll of you. With me being lonely here, I received it when I shouldn't have. Then I learned I was pregnant and was hurt but overwhelmed at the same time because I don't have anyone in the city. The glimmer of hope I just had is gone now too so I'm leaving like we talked about before. I cannot take it here anymore I have to leave. 

My heart is in my stomach. I cannot not make out one word to respond to what I just heard. She could be lying but at the same time I am terrified to ask the nurse. I sit back down to let everything sink in. I may sit there for an hour without moving a muscle, I'm numb.